


A Second Chance At Happiness

by Capsicle2013



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alpha Bucky Barnes, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bottom Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Bucky is 18, Consensual Underage Sex, Eventual Happy Ending, M/M, Mating Bites, Mating Bond, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mpreg, Not Canon Compliant, Omega Steve Rogers, Omega Verse, Original Character Death(s), Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Pregnancy, Pregnant Steve Rogers, Smut, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Stillbirth, Top Bucky Barnes, True Love, Unplanned Pregnancy, steve is 17
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:40:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27730156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Capsicle2013/pseuds/Capsicle2013
Summary: After the loss of their child, after losing Bucky, and after Hydra, Steve was sure he'd never know happiness again. Then he gets another chance.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers & Avengers Team
Comments: 62
Kudos: 198





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you all are having a wonderful day! I just wanted to say I'm so thankful for every single one of you! Your support and loves means so much to me!
> 
> I know I usually write Stony, but I had this Stucky story sitting in my docs for a while and decided to go ahead and post it. I've never done Stucky before but they are my second favorite ship and I wanted to try it. I hope you all enjoy it!

Steve’s heard the stories and had been advised to look out for the signs that would determine his second gender. He wanted nothing more than to be an alpha. Alphas were at the top, well respected by everyone. It wasn’t everyday when someone went out of their way to show him a little decency. He grew up watching the way the world treated alphas. He wanted that.

But he was sick and small. The moment he took his first breath his life was going to be a battle. He never did grow big and strong like the other kids-they would all be alphas some day. His mother assured him that it didn’t matter how he presented, she would love him unconditionally. But it mattered to Steve. He was tired of being the scrawny kid.

Then at the age of 17 it happened.

The signs had been subtle at first: flushed skin, mild cramps and nausea. Those symptoms were familiar to him and at first he wondered if he was coming down with another illness. He didn’t want to jump ahead and assume what he was feeling was the start of a rut. Bucky, his best friend, had felt off before the start of his, and Steve wondered if he was going into a rut too.

His mother forces him to stay in bed. It was times like this when he was thankful she was a nurse. She had always been nurturing and caring. Being a nurse suited her, it was her calling. She never left his side whenever he was sick, always there to coddle and nurse him back to health. It’s how it’s always been.

The fever is getting worse along with the buzz under his skin. It’s like an itch he can’t scratch. Steve whines and buries his face in the pillow, hoping and praying that it doesn’t get any worse from here.

The cotton of his shirt is scratchy, rubbing along his skin in the most uncomfortable way. Steve sits up to discard the article of clothing, sighing in relief when the coolness of the room touches his bare skin. It’s not enough to bring him relief. He needed more.

He plops back with a groan and peels the thin sheet off of him, grimacing at the way it clings to his body. Steve pants heavily, eyes squeezing shut when his belly twinges painfully. He releases another moan of pain and rolls over onto his side, clutching his belly when it continues to cramp.

A soft knock on the door reaches his ears and Steve lifts his head. The door opens and his mother appears in the doorway, a sad expression on her face. Steve lets out a small whine and she comes closer, laying her hand over his forehead.

“Ma," he croaks, hating how his voice sounds. His mother gently runs her fingers through his hair.

“I know, sweetheart.” The sound of her voice is comforting but it’s not enough. Steve needs something else. Her touch and voice alone weren’t going to cut it.

“Is it my rut?”

His mother doesn’t respond at first, almost as if she’s trying to find the answer. “Could be,” she eventually says but her tone sounds off, unsure. “You need to rest and I’ll get that fever down.”

Steve whines and turns away from her. He just wanted to feel better, for the ache to go away. He didn’t even know what the urge he had was for, but he wanted it gone.

“Bucky is outside.”

At those words, Steve is perking up. He rolls back over and pulls himself into a sitting position. “He is? Where?”

His mother’s gaze falls on the doorway and Steve follows. There’s Bucky, lingering in the entryway, a small smile on his face. Steve is ready to call him over but his mother sends him a stern look.

“You need to rest, Steve. Bucky can visit another time.”

“Ma, please? Just for a little while?”

Sarah looks between her son and the boy she considered one of her own, and with a heavy sigh, waves Bucky in. Bucky rushes over, his smile growing brighter at the sight of his friend.

“Just for a few minutes,” Sarah warns, making sure to waggle a finger in Bucky’s direction.

“Yes, ma’am.” Bucky nods politely.

Sarah tucks Steve back into bed and places a kiss to his forehead, then she leaves the room and shuts the door behind her.

“You look like hell.”

“Nice to see you too, jerk.”

Bucky chuckles and steps further into the room until he’s near the edge of the bed. He lowers himself down near Steve’s feet. “What is it this time?”

“Don’t know. Hopefully I’m presenting.”

“Bout time.” Bucky jokes.

The only thing Steve can do is glare in his direction. If he had the strength he'd throw his pillow at him, but the dirty look would have to do for now.

“Was your rut like this?” Steve asks.

Bucky frowns as he ponders for a moment. “I remember feeling like crap. But you seem...different. Maybe you’re presenting as an o-”

“Don’t. I want to be an alpha.”

“It’s not a bad thing. I don’t care, Stevie. I’ll love you anyway.”

Steve can’t help but flush at those words. He loved his best friend too, probably more than he should. Bucky was more than just a friend. They’ve been inseparable for as long as he could remember. It was always going to be them. Till the end of the line.

He wonders if it’s the fever that’s making him delirious, but he has the sudden urge to yank Bucky by his overalls and smash their lips together. He could never do that of course. His crush for his best friend was just that, a crush. It meant nothing. It wasn’t like Bucky looked at him like that anyway.

Bucky was clearly the better looking of the two and the girls chased after him, not once bothering to give Steve a second glance. Bucky deserved an omega that was beautiful. Steve was none of those things.

“You okay, pal?” Bucky’s voice cuts through Steve’s thoughts. Bucky has moved closer, one hand stretching out until it’s laying over Steve’s forehead. Steve can’t help the small whine that escapes him. “Jesus, Stevie, you’re burnin’ up. Want me to get your ma?”

“N-no. Just want you.” Steve finds himself leaning into Bucky’s touch. The feeling of Bucky’s hand against his heated skin was electrifying, overwhelming, but good at the same time. Steve needed more of his touch. “B-Buck, please?”

“What do you want, Stevie?”

“You.”

Bucky nods and crawls onto the bed until he’s lying beside Steve. This wouldn’t be the first time Bucky has chosen to curl up around him. Steve was always coming down with something and it had always been Bucky to be there for him, comforting him the only way he knew how.

“I got you, pal.”

Steve whimpers and clings onto Bucky tightly, burying his face into the crook of the alpha’s neck. He inhales the familiar scent, sighing softly. Bucky’s scent always calmed him down.

But now it was doing something else. Steve’s cock stirs in his pajama bottoms and a rush of wetness pools between his legs. He yelps in surprise and tries to pull away, not wanting Bucky to know what happened.

“What? Steve, what’s-” Bucky pauses and he gives the air a sniff. His sky blue eyes darken. “Shit. You...you…”

Steve peers up at him, cheeks growing hot from not only the fever but the blush that creeps over him. “What?”

“You smell so good.” Bucky sniffs the air again and he moans softly. “Shit, Stevie, I think you’re going into heat.”

Steve shakes his head. “N-no. I’m supposed to be an al-”

“Nuh-Uh. I smell you. You’re in heat.”

Steve whimpers and tries to distance himself but Bucky is faster and pulls him close. “Hey, it’s okay. At least you know what the hell's going on. I don’t care if you’re an omega.”

“Omega’s aren’t special, Buck! They’re only good for one thing and that’s having pups. No one will ever look at me as anything else.”

“I will. I don’t see you as just a housewife. You’re this feisty, stubborn as hell punk that I’ll follow without a second thought. You’re stronger and braver than any alpha out there.”

“You’re just saying that.”

“'M not. You’re special and any alpha would be lucky to have you.”

Steve’s heart sinks at those words. Any alpha. Not Bucky. Bucky didn’t want him.

Sarah returns to the room and Bucky takes that as his cue to leave. The aroma of an omega in heat penetrates the air and Sarah makes sure to send Bucky a warning growl. Bucky leaves the room like a sad puppy with its tail between its legs.

The room is silent for a few moments. Steve doesn’t say a word, doesn’t bother to tell his mother about his new discovery. She could probably smell it anyway.

“Becoming an omega isn’t the end of the world,” she tells him softly and she places a cool cloth over his head.

“I wanted to be an alpha. Omega’s don’t get any respect.” Steve pouts.

“Some alpha’s don’t either. Your father wasn’t respected by everyone. There’s some good ones out there, Steve.”

“Yeah. I know one.”

Sarah smiles and leans down to kiss his head. “Then he’s all you need. Get some rest.”

“I love you, ma.”

“I love you more.”

* * *

The fever was getting worse and the urge to be near an alpha was borderline painful. He needed Bucky and his comforting scent. He needed his knot.

Steve tosses and turns, praying the ache would leave him alone. But the urge persists. The only way to rid himself of this excruciating pain would be to mate.

He was too young to be mating. There were the possibilities of an unwanted pregnancy. Steve was too young to have pups. His mother and him struggled enough as it was and adding another mouth to feed into the mix would be a nightmare.

Steve wasn’t too worried about that, though. It wasn’t like he had an alpha to mate with anyway. No alpha wanted him.

It’s late and his mother had already gone to bed. Steve lies awake, whimpering and writhing under the thin sheet. He works his cock furiously, trying to bring himself some relief. It’s not enough. He’s already come three times and the ache was still there. He needed more.

He trails his other hand between his legs to tease around his hole. He’s met with wetness and he hisses from the sensitivity. The slick coats his curious finger and he slides in with barely an effort, moaning from the feeling of being stretched.

“Ah ah.” Steve sinks his finger in deeper, brushing along his sensitive walls. He grows braver and adds another, a choked moan escaping him when he applies pressure to a spot inside of him. His body tenses and he comes with a gasp, his cock spurting along his stomach and chest.

Steve pumps the fingers in and out, his pace increasing and he comes again, slick gushing out and making a mess of the sheets. He removes his fingers and glances down at himself, grimacing at the mess he’s made.

He grabs a rag to clean himself, hissing when he brushes the cloth along his sensitive cock. It twitches, the head leaking and making more of a mess. He tosses the dirty rag to the side and lies back down, forcing his eyes shut and hoping for sleep. But it never comes.

The itch hadn’t been scratched. Steve whimpers and tugs at his cock again until it’s filling up. He gives it a few strokes before deciding to finger himself again.

“Yes.” He hisses and tips his head back when he slides two fingers into himself. He rocks back on them, the feeling pulling little moans and whimpers from him. He brushes against that spot again and cries out, one hand flying up to cover his mouth. The apartment remains silent.

Steve starts back up again, fingering himself hurriedly before he does end up waking his mother. He clenches down on his fingers, more slick spilling from his loose hole. He was close. He just needed a little more.

He freezes when he hears a soft tap against his window. Steve slowly slides his fingers from himself and wipes them on the sheets, then he’s pulling his pants up and getting out of bed to investigate. The smell of an alpha hits him the moment he opens the window.

Bucky crawls through, ignoring the scolding Steve gives him. “I had to see you,” Bucky explains. “It’s been two whole days, Stevie.”

“Go away.” Steve tries to scold but it comes out like a pathetic whine. He sniffs the air, inhaling the familiar scent. His pants grow wet again. “Buck, please? It’s so bad.”

“Holy shit that’s you!” Bucky inhales. The same look he wore the day they both discovered Steve’s approaching heat comes back, his eyes darken again and his scent changing. It’s stronger than Steve remembers it being.

“Go away.” Steve tries to push his friend toward the window.

“You sure? I can help.”

Steve shakes his head at the suggestion but deep down he wants nothing more than for Bucky to claim him.

“Can’t. We’re...you just can’t, Buck.”

“Who says?”

“You don’t like me like that and I don’t want to make you do something you’re going to regret. I love you too much to lose you.”

“You love me, huh?”

Steve peers up at his friend and nods his head. “Yes,” he whispers.

“Well shit. I was wondering when you’d say that.”

“What?”

“I love you too, punk. Always have, always will.”

“But I’m-”

“I told you I don’t care. You’re perfect.” Bucky comes closer and pulls Steve into his arms. He leans down to press his forehead against Steve’s. “You’re beautiful. I meant it when I said any alpha would love to have you. I was kinda hoping it would be me.”

“You want me?” Steve asks.

“Yeah. I’m crazy about you.”

“It’s not just my heat?”

“Nope. I loved you before all this. But to be honest it’s making it hard not to kiss you.”

“Then do it.”

Bucky grins that perfect smile Steve can’t get enough of and ducks his head to capture Steve’s lips in a kiss. The omega gasps and clings onto Bucky’s firm shoulders, bringing him closer until their bodies are pressed together. Steve squeaks in surprise when he’s lifted up and carried to the bed. Bucky places Steve down gently and hovers over him.

“P-please?” Steve begs, his voice barely above a whisper.

“I got you,” Bucky promises and leans down to kiss Steve again. He’s gentle, taking his time exploring Steve’s mouth. Bucky is too soft for Steve’s liking and he pushes Bucky away.

“Please? I need more...I need…” Steve whines pathetically and bucks his hips, hissing when his sensitive cock rubs against Bucky’s thigh. “Bucky, please!”

Bucky ducks his head down again and buries his face in Steve’s neck, licking along the sensitive gland there. “I got you,” he murmurs against the spot Steve wants him to sink his teeth into. Bucky teases the area with gentle kisses and licks, barely scraping his teeth over the spot. “You’re so gorgeous, Steve. So perfect.”

Steve whines at the praises and bucks up again, whimpering in frustration from the lack of friction. He needs more.

Bucky trails a hand between them until it’s hovering where Steve wants it most. Bucky plays with the hem of Steve’s pants before lowering them down his legs. He takes his cock, stroking the heated flesh and smearing the precome around the head. Steve throws his head back with a moan, eyes falling shut as he focuses on the pleasure.

“This good?” Bucky asks, sounding a little unsure. Steve lifts his head to peer up at him, finding a look of uncertainty written on the alpha’s face. Bucky rarely let his insecurities show, he was always the more confident of the two. He had more experience when it came to this sort of thing...at least, that’s what Steve thought.

It hits him that they were both about to experience this moment for the first time. Bucky hadn’t mated before, never gave up his virginity to just any omega. He was saving it for Steve. It was always going to be Steve.

“Y-yeah.” Steve’s voice is too breathy for his liking but the look of pure love and desire on Bucky’s face in combination with his touch was overwhelming. “So good, Buck. Don’t stop. Please don’t stop.”

Bucky doesn’t and he strokes Steve’s cock a few times before he’s pulling away and spreading Steve’s legs wide, showing off his leaking hole. Bucky takes a moment to admire the scene in front of him; his burning gaze has Steve blushing and trying to hide away.

“Don’t.” Bucky keeps his legs open. “You’re so beautiful.”

Their lips meet again and Steve gasps into Bucky’s mouth when his hole is teased. Bucky circles the tip of his finger around the ring of muscle before pushing in; he slides in effortlessly.

“Fuck,” Bucky curses and pulls his finger back before thrusting it back in. “You’re so wet.”

Steve watches with hooded eyes as Bucky fingers him. He adds another finger and begins to thrust them, and it’s not long before he finds that spot inside Steve and elicits a moan from the omega.

“B-Bucky!” Steve cries, his back arching off the bed. A rush of slick pours out of him, coating the inside of his thighs and Bucky’s hand. Bucky plows through it, creating a squelching sound in the room. Steve’s face burns from the sound his body makes, but it’s quickly forgotten when Bucky continues to rub that sensitive spot. “Ah! Buck, gonna come!”

Bucky growls and applies more pressure until Steve is coming. His cock twitches and spurts, creating tiny puddles along Steve’s chest. His hole gushes and Bucky has to rip his hand away from the amount of slick that erupts.

“Bucky, please!” Steve whimpers. He’s lost count of how many times he’s come but it’s not enough. He needs to mate. He needs an alpha. “Please claim me. Bucky, I need...I need…”

“Shh, I got you, doll.” Bucky croons and kisses Steve again. He breaks the kiss to ask, “you really wanna do this?”

Steve nods his head frantically, unable to form real words. It’s enough for the alpha and he works quickly on shedding his clothes, then he’s positioning himself between Steve’s legs and pushing inside.

Bucky groans, his eyes falling shut at the feeling of having his cock surrounded in Steve’s tight heat. “Shit, Stevie you feel so good. Can I move?”

“Yes. Bucky, please. Please I need you. I need you.”

“I’m here.” It’s said like a promise, because that's exactly what it is. Bucky was always going to be there.

Bucky starts to move, sliding his cock out until the tip remains before pushing back in. Steve wraps his legs around his waist, urging him closer. Bucky grunts and thrusts harder, causing Steve to cling to him tightly and moan.

It only takes a few more thrusts before the base of Bucky’s cock begins to tingle. He fucks harder into Steve, chasing after his release.

“Fuck, Stevie. Gonna...gonna...come.” Bucky growls when Steve clenches down around him, milking his knot. “Ah, Steve. ‘M close.”

“Please.” Steve can feel the knot expanding, stretching his already loose hole even more. With another hard thrust, Bucky forces the knot inside and locks them together. Steve cries out his release and his cock spills between them.

Bucky presses their mouths together to silence Steve’s moans. He keeps moving until he’s reaching his own release and he comes with a grunt. Bucky buries his face in Steve’s neck and bites down on the gland, creating a bond between them.

“Bite me, Stevie.”

Steve leans up and digs his teeth into Bucky’s mating gland, breaking the skin and lapping at the new mark. Bucky groans and his body shudders as he empties again inside Steve’s body.

“You did so good,” Bucky praises and kisses Steve’s lips softly.

They break apart and Steve buries his face in Bucky’s neck, nuzzling the mark he put there. Bucky was his alpha, his mate. It was something Steve never imagined.

“We’re...mates,” Steve whispers, still unable to grasp the idea.

“Yeah,” Bucky whispers back. “You okay with that?”

“More than okay. I’m...I guess I never thought you’d- because I’m me and-”

“It’s always been you.”

“Really?”

“Always. I love you, Steve.”

Steve smiles and kisses Bucky again. “I love you, too.”

Bucky’s knot eventually softens, allowing him to pull out and wrap Steve in his arms. The omega purrs, happy and content in his alpha’s arms. For a moment nothing else matters. Steve doesn’t think about what his mother was going to say or the possibility of a pup. They’d cross that bridge when they got there.

“You’re staying, right?” Steve whispers. A part of him wonders if Bucky was going to slip back out the window he came through. His question is answered when Bucky pulls him closer and kisses his forehead.

“I’m not going anywhere.”

Happy with that thought, Steve allows himself to drift off. Safe and warm in Bucky’s arms.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof it’s been awhile since I’ve updated this one. I got busy with life and a few of my other works, but I haven’t forgotten about this one. I don’t know how long this story is going to be but...we’ll see I guess. 
> 
> Anyway, hope you all enjoy it! And Happy New Year!!! 🎆

When Steve wakes up, he’s warm and wrapped in Bucky’s arms. Bucky is still fast asleep, snoring softly against Steve’s neck. He hadn’t moved his face away since they spent the night cuddled in bed. Steve didn’t mind having him so close; Bucky was his comfort, his everything, his alpha.

Steve’s heart flutters at the thought. He finally had an alpha, a mate to call his own. He wouldn’t have to worry about spending this life alone. He had Bucky. It would always be Bucky.

It’s tempting to fall back asleep, and for a moment he contemplates it, but then he forces himself to remain awake. He wasn’t sure if he was still in heat or if it was over now that he properly mated and bonded with an alpha. He no longer has the uncontrollable urge to be mated, and his skin, though warm from being curled up with Bucky, isn’t scorching hot. He’s comfortable and at ease.

Steve watches as Bucky sleeps, a smile forming over his face at the thought of his beautiful alpha. They had only meant to be best friends, but fate had other plans and now they were a mated pair. They were soulmates. They belonged to no one else but each other.

The omega is gentle when he brushes back the dark strands of hair that have fallen in Bucky’s face. Bucky stirs, his nose scrunching up and one hand coming up to swat away Steve’s hand.

“Quit it, punk,” Bucky mumbles. Blue eyes flutter open and Bucky sends Steve a tired smile. “Morning, gorgeous.”

Steve huffs out a laugh and playfully slaps the alpha’s shoulder. “Shut up, jerk.”

“‘M not lying. You’re so beautiful.” Bucky snuggles closer and buries his face back in Steve’s neck, inhaling the sugary scent. “‘Mmm. You smell good, too.”

“Buck, stop.” Steve giggles when Bucky pulls him close to tickle his sides. “Bucky!”

Bucky stops and runs his hands down Steve’s sides instead, making sure to brush his fingers against the soft skin. “You really are beautiful, Stevie. How’d I get so lucky?”

“I’m nothing special.”

“Shh.” Bucky hushes Steve and places a finger against the omega’s lips. “You’re stunning, absolutely perfect. I love you so much it hurts.”

“Now you’re just being a sap.” Steve rolls his eyes.

“Maybe I am.” Bucky gives a small shrug in response. “But I still love you. You’re all mine.”

Steve smiles and curls up against the alpha. Bucky wraps his arms around Steve’s smaller form, and rubs a hand along Steve’s arm.

“I don’t know how anyone else is going to feel about it,” Steve murmurs.

Mating and bonding with his best friend was unexpected. His mother always made sure to tell him to wait until he was older to mate and bond with an alpha. Steve had gone against her wishes and done the one thing he was forbidden to do. He was too young. At seventeen he should be focusing on school, not finding a mate.

And then there was Bucky. The alpha had so much to live for, so much for him to do with his life. Bucky was strong and smart. He was popular and got along with just about anyone. He deserved an omega that could take care of him and any future pups. Steve couldn’t do that. He could barely take care of himself.

He probably couldn’t even bear children. He was sick and scrawny; his body wasn’t meant to hold pups. Bucky had always wanted a big family. Steve could never give him that. Maybe their bonding was a mistake.

“This is wrong.” Steve sighs and pushes Bucky away, ignoring the confused look that crosses the alpha’s face. “We never should’ve done this.”

“Whoa. Where the hell is this comin’ from?” Bucky questions.

“I’m me and you’re you and-”

“Yeah. So?”

“So it could never work. You don’t deserve this, Buck. You deserve a good omega. I can’t do anything an omega is supposed to do. We can’t have pups-”

“Then we adopt.”

“You’re missing my point!”

Bucky huffs and backs off. “What is your point, Stevie?”

“I’m not good enough.” Steve peers up at Bucky with glistening eyes. Bucky sighs and brings the omega back into his arms. This time Steve doesn’t fight him.

“You’re good enough for me,” Bucky says. “I don’t care if we don’t have pups or money or a decent place to live. All I want is you.”

Steve scoffs.

“I mean it. None of that matters if I have you. It’s always going to be you.”

“What about what others think?”

“Fuck them. They don’t matter.”

“But my ma and your parents-”

“It’s okay. We’ll tell them together. And if they don’t like it then...then we run away, start a new life somewhere else.”

Steve huffs out a small laugh. “You’re an idiot.”

“Yeah?” Bucky grins. “But I’m yours, right?”

Steve nods and leans closer to press their lips together. “Mine,” he says, once they break apart.

Bucky smiles again and brings Steve in for another kiss. Their lips barely brush against each other’s before a loud pounding on the door forces them apart.

“Shit!” Steve cries and scrambles out of bed to get dressed. He works quickly to throw on his clothes, then he hands Bucky his. “Hurry up. Ma sounds-”

“Steven Grant Rogers!” Sarah’s voice booms from the other side of the door, followed by another round of frantic knocking. “You come out this instant!”

“In a minute!” Steve calls out to her.

“And bring James with you!”

Bucky mutters a curse and jumps out of bed, rushing to get himself presentable. It would prove futile; they both smelled like the other. Their secret wasn’t a secret anymore.

“Guess we’re telling everyone now,” Bucky says.

Steve sighs. “Guess we are.”

* * *

His mother’s gaze is heated, her once sparkling blue eyes dark and full of rage. Steve has seen this look on her a few times, mostly when he rebelled against her or got himself into another fight in the alleyways. Not once, in his whole existence, has she ever made him feel like a disappointment. But he felt like one now.

“Ma, I’m sorry,” Steve says first. “I let Bucky in-”

“No, it’s my fault,” Bucky adds. “I came over last night and-”

Sarah holds up a finger to silence them.

“Finding a mate and creating a bond needs to be taken seriously. You boys are too young to understand-”

“Ma, Bucky is 18. He’s an adult! I’m practically one. We can decide for oursel-”

“You’re too young!” Sarah cries. “You’re not ready to mate and start a family!”

“Why!” Steve yells. “Because I’m not good enough? Because I’m a lousy excuse for an omega? I love him, ma. And I don’t care what you think.”

Sarah inhales sharply and her gaze falls on Bucky. “Go home, James. Your mother is worried sick.”

Bucky nods and rises to his feet. He pauses, quickly ducking his head down to peck a kiss to Steve’s cheek, then he nods in Sarah’s direction and rushes out of the apartment. Steve jumps to his feet, running back to his room and ignoring his mother’s calls for him.

It’s well into the evening when Sarah does check on her son. Steve is sitting on his bed, knees pulled up to his chest and both arms wrapped around them. He looks like the small pup she remembered him to be.

“Steve?” She says his name softly and he peers up at her with red-rimmed eyes. She sighs sadly and steps into the room, taking a seat on the edge of his bed.

“I know what you’re going to say.” Steve sniffs and wipes his nose with the sleeve of his shirt. “But I love him. I know we’re just kids but I love him. Bucky means everything to me. I’m glad he’s my alpha.”

“He does mean a lot to you. I’ve seen it throughout the years. I’m sorry I lost my temper. I got scared because I was afraid you had made a mistake. You’re still young, sweetheart, and I wanted you to be sure that you found the one.”

“But he is the one, ma. It’s always going to be Bucky. Dad was the one meant for you and Bucky is meant for me. And I don’t care what anyone else thinks.”

Sarah smiles softly. “You’re so stubborn, Steve. No one can ever come between you and Bucky. You won’t let them.”

Steve sniffs again. “So are you okay with it?”

“I just want you to be happy.” Sarah reaches out a hand to brush away the tears on her son’s face. “I’ll love you no matter what decisions you make.”

“I’m sorry.” Steve whispers and more tears run down his face. “I had wanted to wait but-”

“I know. But it’s done now and not worth fretting over. I’m here for the both of you.” Sarah smiles and rises to her feet. She ducks down to place a kiss to the top of her son’s head. “I love you.”

“I love you too, ma.”

Sarah leaves, making sure to close the door behind her. She grins to herself when she hears the sound of someone knocking on Steve’s bedroom window.

With his mother gone, Steve rushes to his window the moment he hears Bucky. He throws the window open and allows his mate into the warm room.

“I had to see you,” Bucky says, and pulls Steve into a heated kiss. Steve clings to Bucky tightly, relishing in the feel of his strong alpha. “I love you,” Bucky whispers against Steve’s lips.

“I love you too,” Steve smiles. “My ma...she’s okay with it. With us.”

“My ma too. My dad...he’ll come around. I promise. And if he doesn’t, then I don’t care. We can run away if we have to.”

“No. We’ll figure it out.”

Bucky nods and kisses Steve again. They break apart and Bucky leans down to press his forehead against Steve’s. “I’m sorry if I came on too strong and ruined your plans. I know you wanted to wait and-”

“I never believed I’d find a mate. I guess he was here all along.”

“Me too. I promise that whatever happens that I’ll always be here. Till the end of the line.”

“Till the end of the line.”

* * *

Steve should’ve recognized the signs. Omega’s were built for this thing. They were hardwired and able to sense when they were carrying. Steve missed all of the signals his body was trying to tell him.

He didn’t even know if he could get pregnant. For years he believed that his body was too sick to bear children. But now he was starting to wonder if he had been wrong. He had been wrong about finding a mate. Perhaps he was wrong about pups too.

The nausea and upset stomach isn’t concerning when it makes itself known. Steve just figured he was coming down with another illness. It was nothing new.

But then it doesn’t go away. And then he’s constantly tired despite the amount of hours he sleeps at night. His mother doesn’t notice, and if she does, she bites her tongue and cares for him like she always has.

Bucky tries to come over as much as he can, but he’s busy and dealing with the drama in his own household. His mother had accepted his choice to bond with his childhood friend, but his father hadn’t been as accepting. Bucky assured Steve his father would come around. Steve wasn’t so sure.

But now, as he thinks about the possibility of pups, Steve wondered if this will bring their families together.

Steve goes to school despite the nausea and fatigue. His mother can’t miss work to care for him, and even if she did offer to stay, he would decline. He could go to school.

He never makes it to school. The moment Bucky catches up with him on his morning commute, Steve drags his mate away.

“What’s going on?” Bucky asks once they’re away from listening ears. Steve was sure everyone knew about their bond, but the potential pup was not something he wanted out in the open yet.

The alley Steve has chosen to drag Bucky to is one he’s been in before, albeit for different reasons. Bucky recognizes the area and huffs, no doubt remembering saving Steve’s ass from this very spot.

“Steve, what’s going-”

“I think I’m pregnant.” Steve doesn’t mean to blurt the words out. His plan was to explain his predicament in a less dramatic fashion. Lord knows how many times he’s been the dramatic one of the two.

“You’re-wait, what? You’re pregnant? With pups?” Bucky asks.

“What else, Buck!” Steve snarls.

“Sorry. It’s just...you said…”

“I know what I said.” Steve sighs and leans against the stone wall, resting his head back. “I feel...off. I’m sick.”

“That’s nothing-”

“New. Yeah, I know.”

Bucky heaves out a sigh and mirrors his mate, leaning against the wall. “So...pregnant, huh? That explains the change in your scent.”

Steve glances at him. “You...you knew?”

Bucky gives a nonchalant shrug. “You smelled different. Sweeter. I don’t know. I didn’t connect the dots I guess.”

Steve’s vision blurs and he turns away to hide the tears that have gathered in his eyes. One hand finds its way to his belly.

“We can’t have a pup.” Those words are meant to be for Steve’s ears alone, but Bucky picks up on them. He takes Steve’s hand, forcing their eyes to meet.

“We can. I’m here to stay, Stevie.”

“But we can’t have a pup, Bucky. We’re just a couple of stupid pups ourselves.”

“I don’t care. I can get a job. I’ll find us a place and we’ll be a family.”

“It’s not that simple.”

“It could be. We could have a simple life.”

Steve smiles at that thought. It would just be the two of them and their pup. They could have a big family and a home in Brooklyn. The simple life. Steve wanted that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They’re having a baby! Poor Steve is scared but at least he has Bucky. These two have a journey ahead of them...


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update. I've been trying to work on all of my stories now that I'm forced to lie in bed. This one is a little short and I do apologize. I hope you all enjoy it anyway!

By the time Steve gets home it is well past dinner time. He takes a moment to gather himself before entering the tiny apartment. He picks up on his mother’s scent the second he steps inside, followed by the soft sound of her humming. She’s in the kitchen, back turned as she washes a few dishes. Steve’s eyes travel to the plate of untouched food on the dining table, his stomach rumbling.

But despite his gnawing hunger, he decides to skip out on dinner and sneak up stairs. He doesn’t make it very far and he stops when his mother calls out to him. With a huff Steve goes back down the stairs and pokes his head into the kitchen.

His mother is still facing the sink, her back turned to him. He doesn’t need to see her face to know that she’s upset.

“Sit down.”

Steve rushes into the kitchen at the order and takes a seat in his usual chair. His stomach rumbles again now that there’s food in front of him.

“You need to eat. That pup of yours needs the nutrients.”

Steve sighs and hangs his head. “You know?”

“Of course I know. I knew the moment you fell ill that you were pregnant,” Sarah replies.

“How?”

Sarah glances over her shoulder at her son. “Your scent. I’m assuming that’s how Bucky found out.”

Steve frowns and peers up at her. “Let me guess, you know I went to see him?”

“And skipped school. Guess it’s for the best. I’d hate for your classmates to give you a hard time.”

Steve sulks in his seat. “Yeah.”

Sarah finishes up the dishes and reaches for a dish towel to dry her hand, then she comes over and sits down in the empty chair beside her son. Steve can’t even look up at her. He’s never felt so ashamed.

“I’m sorry, mama.” Steve’s voice is quiet, just like that of a young pup being scolded. He’s afraid to look up and find the disappointment on her face. He went against her.

She sighs sadly and reaches out for him, the tender touch of her hand brings tears to Steve’s eyes. He glances up at her, showing off his glistening eyes. She smiles softly and pulls him into her arms, then presses her lips against the top of his head.

“I’m not angry, Steve. I don’t ever want you to feel like I’m not on your side. I love you no matter what.”

“But I didn’t do what you asked. I-I went behind your back and now I’m being punished. I can’t have a pup, ma!” Steve sobs into his mother’s chest. She holds him tighter.

“I know.”

“What do I do?”

“What does your heart tell you?”

Steve sniffs and pulls away. “I don’t know. I love Bucky and he said he’d be there but...I’m so scared.”

“It’s okay to be scared. I was scared when I learned about you.”

“But you had dad.”

“And you have Bucky. He loves you, Steve. I see it, everyone sees it. That’s all that matters.”

“What if I can’t do this? I don’t know how.”

“I know.” Sarah smiles down at her son and gently brushes his bangs out of his face. “But you’re not alone. I’m here and Bucky’s here. Do I wish you had waited? Yes. But it happened and there’s no point in fretting over it now.”

“I’m sorry, mama.” Steve hangs his head in shame.

“I love you, Steve.” He’s pulled into another comforting hug.

He clings to her tightly, finding comfort in her scent, her touch, in the soothing sound of her heart beating. He wonders if his own pup will do the same when they’re scared. He’d be there to comfort them. He’d be there to love them no matter what.

* * *

Going through with the pregnancy is a lot harder than Steve thought it was going to be. He’s not worried so much about the stares and whispers he gets sent his way whenever he leaves the house, but he’d be lying if he said the negative reactions didn’t hurt. No, he’s more concerned about the well-being of his unborn pup.

Steve’s health conditions were already worrisome when it came to himself, and now he was having to worry about another life it could affect. He was grateful his mother knew what to do and how to care for him. She always made sure he was eating enough, even if that meant she had to work more shifts just to afford the extra bit of food. At times Steve felt like a burden, and he hated when those bad thoughts would enter his mind.

Bucky does everything he can to take care of his mate and pup. He gets a job at the docks, and promises to get them their own place. Sarah shuts that idea down and insists they stay together under her roof. Bucky was seen as an adult, but in Sarah’s eyes, he was just a little pup who needed guidance.

The pregnancy is difficult from the get go. The morning sickness and nausea brings the most concern. Steve struggles to keep anything down, and more often than not, he’s forced to lie in bed until the nausea subsides. Bucky is always there by his side.

It eventually gets easier. The nausea runs its course and Steve is able to eat and drink again. But then new problems arise. The accommodations his body goes through to care for the baby put a toll on Steve. His scrawny body wasn’t built to house and care for a pup. It affected him negatively, making him believe that he was a sorry excuse for an omega. But Bucky is there to assure him that he was perfect.

Steve was grateful he had Bucky.

They curl up together one night before bed, finding immediate comfort in the other’s arms. Steve is exhausted from the work his body goes through to grow their pup, and Bucky from the job at the docks. It’s not the best job in the world, but it helps put food on the table. Bucky had even managed to put aside a bit of money to get their pup its first blanket. Steve sleeps with it every night.

Bucky’s hand is where it always is, splayed over Steve’s belly and rubbing soothing circles over the bump. Pretty soon they’d become three; their pup was due soon.

“Are you scared?” Steve asks, quietly. He doesn’t get a response at first and he figures his mate has dozed off.

“Nah,” Bucky eventually says. “Well, a little yeah. But we’ll be okay.”

“Yeah.” Steve curls up closer to his mate, inhaling the comforting scent. “Do you think it’s a boy or a girl?”

“Girl.” Bucky doesn’t even hesitate and when Steve peers up at him, he finds a smile on his face. “She’d have your eyes and your fiery attitude.”

“And what does she get from you?”

“Me? Nothing. She’s going to be just like you. Perfect.”

Steve nods as he pictures it. But he doesn’t see a little girl. He sees a boy with dark hair and Bucky’s beautiful eyes. They’d even share the same smile.

“I think it’s a boy.”

“Hmm?”

“A boy,” Steve says again and he lays his hand over Bucky’s. “I want to name him James after you.”

Bucky huffs out a laugh. “Like me huh?”

“Of course. He’d be perfect.”

Bucky smiles and leans down to press a kiss against Steve’s head. “I love you. So much.”

“I love you too.” Steve smiles and purrs contentedly in his mate’s arms.

They fall into a comfortable silence. Steve is just about ready to fall asleep before Bucky disturbs him from the peaceful sleep he’s been craving.

“Stevie, he’s not moving like he usually does.”

Steve frowns at those words and sits up, the movement forcing Bucky to let go of him. He places both hands over the bump, brows furrowed in determination as he searches for any movement from his womb.

“Maybe he’s asleep?” Steve hates how unsure he sounds. He knew babies slept a lot and theirs would be no different, but something in the back of his mind screams fear. “Talk to him, Buck. Maybe he just needs to hear you.”

Bucky nods and scoots down on the bed until he’s eye level with his mate’s protruding belly. “Hey, kiddo. I’m really excited to meet you. You’re worrying your ma so can you move or something? Just let us know you’re okay.”

He peers up at Steve, getting a smile in return. He smiles back and lays his head over the bump. “Please?” This time he begs. He fights the tears that gather in his eyes. “Please be okay.”

It doesn’t happen right away, but after a few moments, their pup responds with a push of its foot. It’s not very strong like previous times, but it brings a smile to Bucky’s face nonetheless.

“I love you,” Bucky whispers to his pup. Then he glances up at Steve. “Both of you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh these two are going to suffer now... the next chapter is going to be hard. I'll try and update soon! Thank you so much for reading!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it, guys. This chapter does have a birth scene and...I’m sure you know what else 😞 
> 
> I’m sorry 😭

The timing was all wrong. Steve shouldn’t be in labor yet; they still had at least a few weeks until they were to welcome their pup, but Steve’s body was showing signs of early labor.

He’s forced to stay in bed. Sarah had enforced that rule and it was not to be taken lightly. She was tough despite being an omega, but it was painfully obvious that she was at a breaking point. Seeing her only child suffer was torture.

Bucky found himself in the same position. It was his job as the alpha to care and protect his mate and pup, but he was failing. Steve needed him now more than ever and he couldn’t even provide comfort to his mate.

He stays by Steve’s side, doing everything he can to help him get through this difficult time. Steve welcomes his touch, curling up close to the alpha and inhaling the familiar scent. The whimpers of pain Steve makes is difficult to hear.

“I’m sorry, Stevie,” Bucky whispers and brings the omega closer. He places a gentle kiss to the stop of Steve’s head. “It’ll be over soon.”

Steve’s body shakes and he whines. “It-it hurts, Buck. Make it s-stop.”

Bucky wishes for nothing more than to take Steve’s pain away. It had always been him taking care of Steve whenever he got himself into trouble, and now would be no different. Well, there was one difference in the situation. Fending off bullies was easier than this. Bucky could do that easily. He couldn’t take away Steve’s pain this time.

“It’ll be okay,” Bucky assures. “Your ma said you just need to rest.”

Steve releases another whimper and buries his nose against Bucky’s scent gland. His belly spasms again, pulling another painful whimper from his lips. It was too early for the pup to come now, but Steve’s body refused to continue on with the pregnancy. It wasn’t fair.

“Hurts, Buck. It really hurts!” Steve cries. His alpha only holds him tighter and whispers softly to him, assuring him that everything was going to be okay. But Steve can’t bring himself to believe those words.

The door opens with a creak and Steve lifts his head in its direction, his gaze falling on his mother. She enters the room with towels cradled in her arms. It’s difficult to read her face.

“Ma?” Steve croaks and she glances in his direction for a moment before moving across the room to lay the towels down.

“You’ll be alright, sweetheart,” her tone is soft, but Steve can tell something is wrong. Her scent gives her away.

Steve pushes Bucky away and sits up, forcing himself to ignore the pain in his belly. “Ma, is the pup okay?”

It was difficult to know for sure, but Steve was holding onto hope. The last few days had been hard on him. The movements from his pup appeared to get weaker and weaker until finally stopping altogether. Then the contractions started.

“I don’t know,” Sarah replies honestly and she turns her body around to face him. Her sparkling eyes have lost their shine. Steve has never seen her so scared.

“Is it time?” Bucky asks the question that’s been on everyone’s mind. Steve whimpers again at the thought of having to give birth now. Bucky pulls him back into his arms again and cradles his head.

“It could be.” Sarah comes closer and smiles sadly at the young parents. “It’ll be alright. Sometimes these things happen. Pups have their own schedule.”

“But I’m not ready.” Steve sniffs. More tears gather in his eyes and run down his face. Bucky is quick to wipe them away.

“I know, sweetheart. This could be a false alarm, but it’s better to be prepared just in case.”

Steve nods and his mother leaves to gather more supplies. With her gone, Steve can’t hold his composure and a choked sob escapes him.

“I’m so scared, Buck. He can’t come now.”

“You heard your ma, Stevie. It’s okay. She’s probably seen this at least a hundred times.”

Those words don’t offer Steve comfort either. He sighs sadly and lays a hand over his belly, praying that he feels something. But the movements never come. It’s like his womb is empty.

* * *

Steve screams, his back arching off the bed when he’s assaulted by another contraction. He can hear his alpha’s comforting words and inhale his scent, but it’s not enough. For the first time in a long time, Bucky just wasn’t enough.

The pain doesn’t stop, no matter how hard Steve cries and begs; it keeps coming, escalating each time it returns. His water had finally broken, and now the pain was like it had been dialed up. It’s more intense and Steve is forced to suffer in agony.

His mother rushes into the room with more towels and supplies. She sets up what she needs and positions herself at the foot of the bed.

“Sweetheart, I need to check,” Sarah says in a soothing voice. Steve doesn’t object and allows his mother to perform the exam. He hisses through clenched teeth from the strange feeling of her fingers and turns his upper half toward his mate, seeking out the comforting scent.

“‘M here,” Bucky murmurs against Steve’s head.

Sarah is quick and efficient. “You’re getting close. The pup is in a good position.”

“Mama, it hurts!” Steve cries when his body is wracked by another contraction.

“I know. Just a little longer,” his mother replies.

Steve whimpers and hides his face in Bucky’s neck. He clings to the front of his alpha’s shirt, whimpering and crying when another contraction hits. Bucky can only hold him tight.

It’s well into the evening when Steve’s labor worsens and the time to push arrives. It’s not only the labor that changes, the once clear sky fills with dark clouds and thunder booms in the distance. It couldn’t get any worse.

Sarah mutters a prayer to herself before entering the bedroom to care for her son. He’s screaming again, his body trembling when the contraction becomes too much to bear. Bucky has switched positions; he’s sitting behind Steve, his arms wrapped around his mate and his head ducked low enough to whisper comforting words into Steve’s ears.

Steve can only cry and scream from the agonizing pain. He’s left panting and he throws his head back against Bucky’s shoulder. His hair is damp with sweat and gold strands stick to his forehead.

He perks up when he hears his mother come in. “Mama,” he croaks, his voice raspy from the screaming. His throat burns.

“I’m here,” Sarah soothes and she rushes to his side. Her supplies are ready and she positions herself between his legs. She coaxes them open, shushing him soothingly when her son whimpers. She tries not to worry about the blood covering the inside of his thighs.

“Mama, it hurts,” Steve whimpers, his eyes filling with tears. It’s Bucky who comforts him this time and he hugs his omega tightly.

“On the next one I need you to push,” Sarah instructs. Steve whimpers again, but does as he’s told, bearing down hard along with the contraction. “Good. Another one. Push.”

Steve grunts and pushes again, his face growing red from the strain. Bucky continues to hold him and whisper encouraging words. Steve eases off to catch his breath and tips his head back against Bucky.

“It hurts, Buck. Make it stop. Please make it stop,” Steve begs. The pain from bringing a child into the world was one of the worst experiences he’s ever had. It didn’t even compare to the times bullies ambushed him and beat him.

“It’s almost over and then we’ll meet our pup,” Bucky says. He kisses Steve’s head again, his eyes squeezing shut when his own tears threaten to fall. He couldn’t bear to witness his mate in any more pain.

Steve tenses and releases another cry of pain when the contractions start up again. He grips Bucky’s hand tightly and brings his chin down to his chest, pushing as hard as he can. A fiery pain erupts between his legs, causing Steve to yelp and squirm, trying to get himself away from it.

“Mama!” Steve cries when it becomes too much and his lower half lifts off the bed. Bucky has to use his strength to hold him still.

“I know, I know,” Sarah soothes, repeating the words over and over again.

“Come on, Stevie, push!” Bucky encourages, his excitement growing when Mrs. Rogers announces that she can see the head. Bucky holds Steve tightly and whispers in his ear. “He’s almost here. You’re so strong, Steve. Strongest person I know.”

Steve groans loudly and bears down again, doing everything he can not to give into the exhaustion. His body is drained, screaming for relief from the pain. He wasn’t made for this. He was too weak.

“Buck, I can’t! I can’t!”

“Yes you can. You’re so close. Come on, Stevie.”

Steve takes a deep breath, blows it out, and then bears down again. The pain is unbearable, but he musters the strength to push through it. He’s determined to bring his pup into the world.

“One more,” his mother says between his legs.

Steve gives one more solid push, his lungs burning from the loud scream he produces. The pup slides out with a gush of fluid and Sarah works quickly to wipe it clean.

Steve slumps back with a gasp, his chest rising and falling rapidly. It was finally over.

The room is silent.

Mustering up enough strength, Steve lifts his head, his eyes landing on the bundle in his mother’s arms. She’s rubbing the baby vigorously with a towel, urging it to take its first breath. Steve’s breath hitches in his throat, and his eyes fill with fresh tears.

“Ma? Mama?” Steve whimpers.

He goes ignored, his mother too engrossed with her current task. She’s quietly begging the newborn to make a sound, but it remains lifeless in her arms.

That’s when Steve notices how gray its skin appears. It’s not pink and healthy like how a new pup’s skin is supposed to look. He notices the dark hair on it’s head.

“Mama? Mama, please?”

A few minutes pass before his mother’s attempts cease. She peers up at him, her own eyes bright with tears.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart.”

Steve’s world comes crashing down. A sob rips from his throat and he screams for his child. Bucky is there to hold him, pulling his thrashing body close in an attempt to calm him. The alpha’s own tears are streaming down his face.

Their pup was gone.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im so sorry it’s taking me so long to update this one! I’m still planning it out and I guess I got stuck. Thank you for being patient and such awesome readers 😊

The pup in his arm is tiny, reminding Steve of himself. It’s hair is dark, just like that of its father’s, and Steve was sure if it could open its eyes, they’d be just like Bucky’s. Their son was beautiful.

The tears haven’t stopped falling since the devastating realization. Sarah had cleaned the pup and wrapped it in the blanket Bucky had picked out, then brought it over for the new parents to meet. Her eyes were still wet with tears and she had to turn away quickly to hide the sob that threatened to escape.

Steve cradles his son close, wishing more than anything for him to wake up and show off those beautiful blue eyes. But his son remains completely still, eyes shut and lip slightly parted.

“Please?” Steve whispers, gently running a finger along the pup’s cheek. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“Steve,” Bucky’s voice is thick and raspy. “He’s okay now.”

Steve shakes his head in protest. “No. It’s not fair. I wanted him.”

“So did I.”

This time Steve peers up at his mate, finding his usual confident eyes full of hurt and pain. He’s never seen Bucky so broken.

“Buck…” Steve can’t hold back the sob and it breaks free from his throat, the sound drawing Bucky close and wrapping Steve in his arms. Steve buries his face in Bucky’s chest, his sobs growing louder and louder.

Bucky doesn’t say anything, just holds him close. His own tears run down his face and he hides them in Steve’s hair.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” Steve sobs, repeating those two words over and over.

“It’s not your fault, Stevie,” Bucky assures, but his words do nothing to comfort the grieving omega.

“I did this. It’s my fault.”

Bucky only holds him tighter. “It’s not. You didn’t know.”

But it was Steve’s fault. It was his health conditions that harmed their son and made them lose their pup. Steve would give anything to have their son healthy and alive. It wasn’t fair that their baby had to suffer because of him.

Steve eventually calms down, the sobs now small whimpers. His eyes continue to fill with tears and run down his face, creating new tracks over the dried ones. Bucky doesn’t let him go, not that Steve would ever want him to, but he knows his mate needed to properly say goodbye to their son.

“Hold him, Buck,” Steve says. He can feel Bucky’s body tense against his own. Steve looks up at him, hating the pained expression on his face. “You should hold him. He’s your son too.”

With a shaky breath and a nod, Bucky accepts and allows Steve to place their son in his arms. Fresh tears sprang to his eyes the moment he holds his child for the first time. This wasn’t the scene Bucky had envisioned. Their pup was supposed to be healthy and alive. It was supposed to be the best day of their lives.

“He’s…” Bucky swallows hard, unable to form any words. “Steve, he’s…”

“I know.” Steve lays his head on Bucky’s shoulder. “He looks like you. He’s so beautiful.”

Bucky nods. He traces a finger over the soft skin of the baby’s cheek, hating how cold it was already beginning to feel.

“Hi, kiddo. I love you so much,” Bucky says softly. He brings the baby closer and places a kiss to his son’s head, a sob escaping him. His son was gone.

Sarah watches the scene, her heart breaking for the new parents. It wasn’t just them who had been looking forward to the little pup’s arrival. She had been counting down the days until she would be a grandmother. It was devastating to know that her grandson wasn’t with them. She wishes she could do more to ease the pain.

“What’s his name?” Sarah asks.

“James,” Steve replies without hesitation.

Sarah nods and wipes at the tears that roll down her face. “He’s beautiful.”

Steve releases a sob and his mother rushes to comfort him, taking him into his arms and holding him tight.

“Mama, it hurts,” Steve sobs, his body trembling. “I wanted him. I wanted him so much.”

“Shh. I know, sweetheart. I don’t know why these things happen, and I’m sorry that I can’t take this horrible pain away,” Sarah says, rubbing a soothing hand up and down her pup’s back.

Steve screams from the pain and anger from losing his child. It wasn’t fair.

* * *

The pain from losing their child was never going to fully heal. It was something they’d have to carry with them for the rest of their life. It was the worst pain Steve has ever felt, and he never wanted to experience that again.

He gives up on the idea of a family and pups. It would be risky to try again. Bucky didn’t disagree.

It was hard for Bucky too, but he was stronger than Steve. He still got up every morning and went to work. Steve didn’t have it in him to do anything but stay locked in his room.

His mother was his only comfort when Bucky wasn’t there. But even when Bucky was with him, it didn’t seem like enough.

Steve tries to focus on his drawings when he can, using the hobby as a form of a distraction. He’s considered art school, but now he wasn’t sure how he could do it. All he could think about is the son he lost.

He still sleeps with the blanket at night, holding it close and crying himself to sleep. It still smelled like the little pup.

Bucky tells him they need to try and move on, so Steve tries. And for a moment he’s able to pull himself back together. Then his world comes crashing down all over again.

Seeing his mother sick was difficult. Steve felt helpless, and he wished there was more he could do for her. She’s left to lie in bed all day, and Steve is there by her side.

He’s there until the very end.

Steve grips her hand, tears gathering in his eyes. This would be their last moment together, the last conversation they’d ever have. It wasn’t fair. She was his everything.

“Mama,” Steve chokes back a sob, and the tears flood from his eyes, running down his cheeks. “Don’t go. I-I need you.”

Sarah smiles weakly and reaches out for her son, placing her palm over his wet cheek. Steve leans into her touch, wishing this wouldn’t be the last time.

“You’re so strong, Steve.”

Steve shakes his head in protest. “‘M not, ma. I c-can’t lose you too. Please don’t leave me.”

“I’ll always be with you, sweetheart. No matter what happens, I’ll be there. You just have to keep fighting.”

“I don’t know how. I don’t think I can. I already lost my...please, Mama don’t leave me too.”

Sarah coughs and Steve immediately rushes to the bedside table to get her a glass of water. He helps her take small sips until she refuses the drink.

“Remember what I taught you, Steve. Don’t ever back down, even when you’re told you should. They’re always going to take one look at you and tell you you’re not enough. Prove them wrong. Make them believe in you, just like I always have.”

“What if I can’t?”

Sarah soothing strokes her son’s cheek. “You can. You’re strong, brave, selfless. You can do anything. Don’t give up on your dreams.”

Steve nods and lays his head down on her stomach, another sob ripping through his throat. Her fingers run through his hair, comforting him like she used to when he was a young pup.

“I love you, Mama.”

“I love you, too.”

That was the last time Steve heard those words.

* * *

It’s Bucky who walks Steve home after the funeral. The way home had been quiet, Steve unable to form any words.

“I’m sorry,” Bucky says, making an attempt to end the silence between them. Steve just wishes he had said anything else. He’s heard those same two words all day.

Steve doesn’t respond and makes his way up the steps toward the apartment; Bucky right behind him. Bucky sighs and Steve waits for him to say anything else, but he doesn’t.

He’s been distant lately.

“Steve-”

“I just want to be alone.”

Bucky sighs again. “Talk to me. Ever since the pup-”

Steve tenses at those words and his eyes fill with new tears. “Buck, don’t,” he warns. He loved his mate, but now he wanted to be alone.

“Come on, you know it’s true. You’ve been different.”

Steve scoffs and reaches into his jacket pocket for his house key. He can’t find it.

“You don’t talk to me anymore,” Bucky continues. He notices his mate struggling and he kicks aside the brick that hides the extra key. He hands the key to Steve.

“Buck, I just want to be alone. I’ve lost too much,” Steve says, his fingers wrapping around the key tightly.

“I know,” Bucky sighs sadly and he places a hand over Steve’s shoulder. “But I’m still here. I’m with you till the end of the line.”

Steve smiles at that. He still had his best friend, his alpha to comfort him and assure him that everything was going to be okay.

“Thanks, Buck.”

Bucky pulls Steve into his arms and ducks down to kiss the top of the omega’s head. “I’m still with you. I promise I’m not going anywhere.”

Steve nods and clings to his mate tighter. “You promise?”

Bucky lifts Steve’s chin until their eyes meet and he leans down to kiss him. It was a promise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tweaked that scene 😉 
> 
> Poor Steve has lost so much. First his baby and now his mom. At least he still has Bucky....right? 😬 
> 
> I’ll update soon!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the late update! A lot has happened but I’m glad Texas is slowly getting better. I hope you all are staying safe and warm!

Moving on from the loss of his son and mother isn’t easy. Steve doesn’t know why he thought it would be. Losing them had been hard and one of the worst things that could ever have happened to him. It wasn’t fair that he lost his pup and didn’t get a chance to meet him and watch him grow. He didn’t get a chance to be a mother. He’d probably never get another chance.

Losing his mother hurts just as much if not more. She was all he had. It had been her picking him up whenever he was down, it was her comforting him when he needed a shoulder to cry on. His mother was the only one who understood him. She was the only one who believed in him when no one else did.

Steve didn’t know how he was supposed to continue living now that his mother was gone. He was older now and it was time for him to grow up, but he wasn’t sure if he could do it. He felt like a little pup needing his mother.

He was grateful he still had Bucky. Steve would be lost without his best friend, his mate. Bucky was his rock, his comfort. Steve needed him now more than ever.

They still have each other and Steve couldn’t be happier to have a good alpha by his side. Bucky supports them the best that he can while Steve takes classes at Auburndale Art School. He doesn’t give up on his dreams to create comics. It’s Bucky who encourages him to keep trying.

And for the most part Steve does try. He tries to get up every morning with a positive attitude, though sometimes he struggles. The smile he wears each day is forced and he knows Bucky must notice. Bucky hasn’t been the same either.

Ever since they lost their pup, Bucky had changed. He continued to be the big, strong alpha that Steve needed, but deep down Steve saw past it all. The mask Bucky wore was crumbling and sooner or later he’d have to reveal what he was feeling.

He’s distant. Whenever Steve questions him about it, Bucky blames his job. He’s tired and Steve wishes he could do more to help. His art dream seemed more like a fantasy than reality. But no one would hire a sick omega like him. He was worthless.

Steve is waiting and praying for something good to come their way. They had suffered enough.

But life is cruel and doesn’t care about the hardships you’re already facing.

Then the war starts.

Steve was willing to join the army and fight against the bullies. He wasn’t the strongest by any means, but he wasn’t going to quit. He could fight. He could show his worth.

But omega’s weren’t allowed to enlist. They weren’t seen as fit or worthy enough to join and serve their country. No matter how hard Steve tried to prove his worth, he was laughed at and denied.

He wasn’t going to give up.

* * *

“You can’t go,” Steve seethes. Tears gather in his eyes and he has to fight to hold them back. He had already lost everyone dear to him, and now he was losing his mate too.

“Steve,” Bucky sighs sadly. He doesn’t move from where he’s standing, keeping his distance and lingering in the doorway of their bedroom. He tries to come closer to console his distressed mate, but Steve emits a warning growl and Bucky has no choice but to stay back. “I have to go. Our country needs me.”

“I need you, Buck!” Steve shouts. This time the tears escape and roll down his face. His fingers grip the old duvet beneath him, twisting the material tightly. He’s never been so angry and hurt with Bucky before. Bucky was supposed to take care of him and be there when Steve needed him.

“Stevie,” Bucky’s voice is soft and he comes closer, dropping down on one knee in front of Steve. He takes both of Steve’s hands. “I’m sorry. I know you want me to stay but I...I can’t. I want to fight.”

“But what about us? You said you’d still be here and now you want to leave.”

“I meant what I said.”

“No you didn’t.” Steve rips his hands free from Bucky’s. “Then go. If you don’t care then go.”

“I do care.” Bucky’s tone is harsh. “I care about you and I love you more than anything!”

“Then why are you leaving! Why are you trying to enlist!”

“Why are you!”

There’s a moment of silence between them. They can’t tear their eyes away from each other. Steve notices for the first time how broken Bucky looks. His eyes are shiny with tears and Steve can tell he’s doing everything he can to keep himself together.

“This is about the pup, right?” Steve finally asks. Bucky hesitates for a moment and then he nods. “So you’re running away?”

“I’m not running away.”

“You want to join and leave! You’re running away!”

“I’m not! Damn it, Steve!” Bucky yells and rises to his feet, taking a few steps away and brushing a hand through his hair. “I can’t be here anymore. I can’t take it. All I think about is him and it’s killing me.”

“How do you think I feel? He was my son too. I lost him too, Buck. And I’ve tried to do what you said and move on, focus on my art, but I can’t. I’m dropping out.”

“What? No, Steve-”

“Why? You get to drop everything and run off to another country. Why is that okay? I want to join too. I want to prove that I’m better than what everyone thinks. I want to serve my country too.”

“Steve, you can’t.”

“Why? Because I’m an omega? I don’t care. You always said I was more than that.”

“You are but...I need you here. It’s not safe out there, Steve. If I lost you-”

“And what about me! I could lose you and if I did...Buck, I lost everyone. I lost my son, my Ma. I can’t lose you too.”

Steve lets out a sob and buries his face in his hands. Bucky is at his side in seconds, sitting down beside him and pulling him into his arms. Steve accepts the embrace and turns toward his mate, snuggling against him and burying his nose into Bucky’s neck, inhaling the comforting scent.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry about everything,” Bucky soothes.

“Please don’t go,” Steve sobs.

“I have to.”

“No you don’t. You don’t have to fight. I’ll do it.”

“No. You’re not going. You’re better off here.”

“Buck-” Steve tries to pull away only for Bucky to bring him back.

“Stop. You’re safer here. Let me do this. Let me do something right.”

Steve gives up the struggle and allows Bucky to hold him.

“I love you, Buck.”

“I love you, too.”

“If you go...you promise you’ll come back?”

Bucky nods and holds Steve tighter. “I promise. Till the end of the line, remember?”

“Yeah.” Steve breaks free and leans up just enough to kiss Bucky softly on the cheek. Bucky brings him back and properly kisses him.

“I love you, punk. I promise after the war is over it’ll just be you and me. We can do whatever we want. Maybe you’ll be a famous artist.”

Steve scoffs.

“Don’t do that,” Bucky scolds. “I mean it. You can do anything.”

“Except join the army.”

Bucky sighs harshly. “I know you’d be a great soldier, but you don’t need to do that. There’s plenty of alphas-”

Steve pushes Bucky away and gets up from the bed. When Bucky tries to follow, Steve holds out a hand to stop him.

“Don’t!”

“Steve, come on. I didn’t mean...you know I don’t mean it that way.”

“I know exactly what you meant. I’m sorry I’m not an alpha. I’m sorry I’m not a good omega. I’m sorry it’s my fault we lost our pup. Go and fight. I don’t care anymore.”

“Will you quit it?” Bucky storms over and tries to bring Steve back into his arms, but the omega fights and he’s forced to let him go. “Fine! Jesus. Why do you have to be so stubborn! I’ll leave you alone.”

Bucky leaves the room and Steve rushes after him. Bucky grabs his coat and storms out of the apartment, slamming the door hard behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor babies! 😭 They’re struggling with all their pain and now Bucky wants to leave. It’s just a big mess and unfortunately it’s going to get worse before it gets better. I’ll do my best to update soon!


	7. Chapter 7

Bucky comes home late, smelling of cigarettes and alcohol. There’s no other omega scents, not that Steve would think Bucky would do that to him, but he sniffs the air for them anyway. He was a difficult person and he’d understand if Bucky’s finally had enough of him and decided to leave. Bucky was better off. He could find an omega that wasn’t sick and unable to give him pups. Bucky deserved better.

Steve doesn’t move, lying still and faking sleep while he listens to Bucky shrug off his clothes and changes into his pajamas. The bed dips when Bucky joins him and to Steve’s surprise, the alpha curls up close beside him and wraps his strong arms around his petite waist.

“‘M sorry,” Bucky mumbles against the nape of Steve’s neck as he scents him. Steve wants to ignore the apology and keep up the act that he was sleeping, but he breaks when Bucky sniffs and holds him tighter.

“Me, too,” Steve whispers and he turns himself in Bucky’s arms to face him. He leans in to nose around Bucky’s neck, seeking out the place that smells the most like him, and once he finds it, he inhales deeply.

“You’re not a bad omega,” Bucky murmurs, followed by a shaky breath. “I’m sorry I’m a bad alpha. I’m sorry I can’t be there for you.”

Steve pulls away and tenderly runs his thumb over Bucky’s cheek, wiping away the bit of wetness he finds there.

“You’re not a bad alpha, Buck. You didn’t do anything wrong. I did.”

Bucky shakes his head. “Don’t say that. I want you to stop blaming yourself.”

“You first,” Steve tells him.

Bucky huffs out a small laugh and leans close again to rub their noses together. “Maybe we both need to stop blaming ourselves.”

Steve nods in agreement.

“I love you so much, Stevie. I’m sorry I left.”

“It’s okay.” Steve is quick to accept the apology. He had asked Bucky for space after his mother died and it made sense that his mate would want space of his own sometimes.

“And if you don’t want me to join-”

“Stop. You should. If it means that much to you…”

“I hate that it bothers you.”

“I’m just gonna miss you I guess.”

“You guess?” Bucky teases.

Steve rolls his eyes and shoves his alpha away, only for Bucky to bring him right back in his arms. Steve accepts the embrace, enjoying being this close to his alpha again.

“I want you to enlist,” Steve says while he softly plays with the hair on the back of Bucky’s neck.

“I’ll be safe,” Bucky promises.

Steve smiles softly. He wishes Bucky could keep a promise like that. War was unpredictable and anything could happen. Steve didn’t want to think that way, but he knew he needed to prepare himself. He didn’t get a chance to prepare for his son’s death or his mother’s.

“Just come home,” Steve says and connects their lips.

Bucky pulls away and cups Steve’s face. He smiles and softly says, “I promise.”

* * *

Despite Bucky’s suggestion that Steve stay back and let others serve, Steve ignored it. He was too stubborn and too determined to prove that he wasn’t just some sickly, frail omega. He was capable of doing something right. He was capable of serving his country.

Bucky isn’t too pleased when Steve admits to trying to enlist, but he doesn’t convince him to stay behind and aid in other ways. There were plenty of other jobs suited for him, but Steve wasn’t going to settle. He could fight.

He trains with Bucky at Goldie’s Boxing Gym every chance he gets. Bucky had perfected his boxing skill and was now a three-time YMCA welterweight boxing champion. Steve wondered if he’d ever get a title like that.

They enlist together and Steve is rejected while Bucky is accepted. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that only one of them was going to make it, but Steve wasn’t a quitter.

It’s difficult when Bucky leaves for training. Steve has grown used to having the alpha around every second of every day. They rarely separated from each other.

Steve reminds himself that it was just training and Bucky would come back soon. But that little voice in the back of his head is quick to speak up, reminding him that he better get used to Bucky’s absence. Pretty soon training would be over and his alpha would be shipped out.

Steve didn’t want to think about that day. He couldn’t live without Bucky.

* * *

The pain that radiates through his jaw when the big, strong alpha hits him has Steve wincing and stumbling back, his small form unable to hold him up against the impact. He’s punched again and he falls, quickly scrambling to his feet to defend himself. He doesn’t get a chance to throw in a few punches of his own, and the alpha hits him again, sending him back onto the cold, concrete beneath him.

The next time he’s hit, Steve lands into a couple of garbage cans. He takes the lid from one and spins around to face the alpha, holding the lid out in front of him like a shield. Even his makeshift shield is no match against the alpha’s brute strength, and it’s easily ripped out of Steve’s hands.

Defenseless again, Steve gets punched again and he hits the ground. He picks himself up, keeping his fists raised.

“I can do this all day,” he declares, though slightly out of breath. The alpha chuckles and punches him again, sending Steve back to the ground.

He doesn’t get up right away, his body screaming for a break from the abuse. The alpha is still looming over him, probably ready to issue another punch or even a kick to Steve’s ribs.

Then a familiar scent wafts through the air. Steve inhales deeply, filling his nose with sandalwood and cherries. _Bucky_.

There’s a brief commotion; Steve can vividly imagine the ass kicking his mate is giving to the offending alpha. Steve picks himself off the ground once he’s sure it’s just him and his mate.

“Sometimes I think you like being punched,” Bucky says as he gathers Steve’s belongings he had lost during the fight. He reads over the paperwork, doing his best not to get annoyed when he discovers that his mate has lied on another enlist form.

“I had him on the ropes,” Steve tries to defend and wipes at his bloody and busted lip.

“How many times is this? Oh you’re from Paramus now? You know it’s illegal to lie on the enlistment form. Seriously, Jersey?”

Steve has to fight the urge to roll his eyes and he turns to greet his mate, not expecting to find him sharply dressed in his military uniform. “You get your orders?”

“107th: Sergeant James Barnes,” Bucky beams proudly. “Shipping out to England first thing tomorrow.”

Steve’s heart shatters. This is what that little voice was trying to prepare him for. Bucky was leaving and Steve didn’t know if and when he was coming back.

“I should be going,” Steve says, unable to hide the hurt from his tone. He was capable of fighting alongside other alphas. He just needed a chance.

Bucky sighs and folds up the forms and hands them to his mate. Steve quickly tucks them away into the inner pocket of his jacket.

“There’s plenty of jobs you can do here,” Bucky tries to reason with his mate. He throws an arm over Steve’s shoulder and brings him close enough to lean down and kiss the top of his head. When Steve tries to shrug him off, Bucky sighs and adds, “I’m just looking out for you.”

“I had that alpha-”

“I don’t just mean him, Steve. I know you want to join.”

“But?”

“But...I need you here. Please? Don’t be so stubborn now.”

This time Steve does shrug Bucky off. “I can do this, Buck. Why don’t you believe me?”

Bucky wants to bring up the fact that Steve has been lying on every form, but he bites his tongue. There was no getting through to Steve when he was this determined and this angry.

“Forget it. Can we drop this for now and I take you out? It’ll be fun.”

“Where?” Steve asks, his interest now piqued.

Bucky smiles and hands Steve a newspaper. “The future.”

* * *

The Stark Expo was the last place Steve wanted to be. Sure the new technology was fun and interesting, but Steve’s mind was elsewhere. All he could think about was how this was his last night with Bucky.

They should both be getting shipped off tomorrow, but life loved to fuck with Steve more than it already has. Couldn’t life cut him some slack? He had already lost enough. Why did he have to lose his mate too?

Steve’s mood is easily reflected in his scent. He doesn’t miss the way Bucky’s nose wrinkles and how he pulls Steve close every chance he gets. Steve wants to be happy and enjoy the event and the promise of dancing afterwards-even if he has two left feet-but he can’t find any joy.

“Come on, Stevie,” Bucky urges and pulls Steve close, scenting him in hopes of calming down the omega. “We’re supposed to be having fun.”

“This is fun,” Steve lies.

“But _you’re_ not having fun. I can smell it.”

“I don’t want you to go.”

Bucky sighs. “I know.”

When Bucky doesn’t add anymore, Steve drops it. Who was he to tell Bucky not to go? Bucky wanted to serve and Steve wasn’t going to get in his way. He could be a good, supportive omega. Even if it killed him.

Steve doesn’t even find the flying car-or the attempt of a flying car-all that interesting. Bucky is smiling and clapping, obviously enjoying his last night. Steve wishes he could say the same.

He slips himself free from Bucky when his eyes wander around the other exhibits and he notices a nearby enlistment area. He sneaks away from Bucky to make one last attempt to enlist.

While Steve waits for his turn, he poses beside the picture of a soldier dressed in a military uniform. Steve sighs when he only comes up to the soldier's chin, his short stature once again an issue.

“I thought we were supposed to be having fun?” Bucky’s voice fills Steve’s ears and he turns to find his mate.

“I can’t stay behind, Buck. I should be going with you tomorrow,” Steve says.

“There’s other jobs-”

“I don’t want to do other things! I can fight.”

“This isn’t a back alley, Steve. This is war.”

“You don’t think I can do this.”

“I never said that-”

“You don’t have to.”

“Steve-”

“Bucky, come on. There are men laying down their lives. I got no right to do any less than that. That’s what you don’t understand. This isn’t about me.”

“Right,” Bucky scoffs. “Because you got nothing to prove.”

Steve’s jaw clenches. He waits for Bucky to leave like the last time they fought, but the alpha never does. He stays like Steve hoped he would.

“I just want you to be safe. I can’t lose you.” Bucky takes Steve’s hands in his own and brings the omega close.

“I will be safe,” Steve assures.

“You’re all I have. If I lost you-” Bucky’s steel blue eyes fill with tears.

Steve hugs him tightly, letting the alpha cry softly into his shoulder. “You won’t,” Steve whispers.

* * *

The room is filled with their mixed scents of arousal. Steve buries his nose in the crook of Bucky’s neck, inhaling the musky alpha scent and licking along the bond mark he had put there. Bucky growls above him, his hips moving faster and rougher. Steve moans when that spot inside of him is hit.

Tomorrow Bucky would be gone and they would be forced to live apart. Steve didn’t want to think about being away from his mate. He had lost everyone important to him.

He clings to Bucky tightly, soft moans and whimpers leaving his lips every time the alpha thrusts deeply into him. Being with Bucky like this takes him back to the night when they admitted their feelings and mated for the first time. Steve can’t help but fear this could be their last.

“Steve, ‘m gonna-” Bucky warns.

As much as Steve wants his alpha to knot him, he knows they shouldn’t. They hadn’t discussed having any more pups after losing their son. Steve was too fearful, terrified that the past would repeat itself. The death of their pup was too much, and Steve couldn’t imagine putting himself and Bucky through that again.

“Don’t,” Steve tries to shove his mate off before Bucky gets lost in the pleasure and knots him by mistake.

Bucky stills his movements and glances down at Steve, brows furrowed he asks, “Why?”

“We...we can’t, Buck.” Steve’s eyes fill with tears and he squeezes them shut to hide it from Bucky.

“You don’t want to...I mean, we could. I wouldn’t mind coming home to you-”

“No,” Steve shakes his head and opens his eyes, revealing the tears to his mate, “we can’t. I-I don’t...I’m scared.”

“I know.” Bucky leans down to kiss Steve softly. Steve responds immediately and wraps his arms around Bucky’s neck.

Steve holds Bucky close as they make love and again after they’ve finished. He wants to relish the last few hours he has left with his mate.

“Come back okay?” Steve whispers, nuzzling his nose against Bucky’s bond mark.

Bucky holds Steve tight and presses a kiss to the top of his head. “I promise.”


End file.
